Monday, January 30, 2012

changes and priorites

So conviction hurts sometimes.  Especially when I don't feel like make changes that i know God wants me to.  U social network way too much.  i constantly check Facebook throughout the day hoping for something new.  really, it is ridiculous.  Yes, I know I have said this before.  Once again, I am taking a break during the week.  I am also removing myself from most of the "groups" I am a part of.  I hate drama and there is a lot of drama on those pages that I find myself wanting to know everything about.  I can't help myself and that is not how I want to be.  Let me clarify I don't get involved in it, I just like to observe it all unfold.  It 's depressing.    I will only get on to check notifications for my business page  Kennedy Createables.  I still need to answer messages and take orders.  I have a kindle I am saving for and would also like fun money for the family.   I also get messages sent to my email so I am not completely disappearing.  You will also get my daily blogs and see posts from Pinterest.  I adore my pinterest  I have gotten so many great ideas from there for basically everything.  So to keep up with me, message me or I may actually have to pick up the phone and venture outside my own four walls.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Different world than when I grew up

So there have been some recent events going on around where I live that just infuriate me.  No details will be given.  If you know me personally msg me and  I will share.  This has nothing to do directly with my kids but it does affect them.  When I was a kid I could ride or walk all over town.  I remember riding my bike from my house to the library along a highway by myself when I was about 10.  There were sidewalks so it was not that dangerous.  I could just ride my bike over to friends houses.  I could play outside by myself without having to worry about harm.    I could go be a kid and play in the woods or go to the store and put quarters in the little gumball machines to get treats.  As long as I left a note, all was good.  This was before cell phones even.  Not today.  MY kids don't get those luxuries because there are evil people in this world that have become more prevalent.Even at 12 my eldest can not ride her bike just where ever or play where ever by herself.  I do give my children some freedoms.  They can play at the park but I can literally see it from my house.  They have to stay within the range of me calling for them.  They are allowed to ride around a little further distance with a friend.  My middle child used to be allowed to play in the woods with a friend, until today.  Because of an incident yesterday that happened in my area of living.  There are conflicting reports where so this is why I am vague.  The fact that I have to have a conversation with my kids about this makes me mad because they will have to be worried about things I never even worried about growing up.  A part of their innocence gone with a conversation about being careful when playing.  This I believe is part of the reason more and more kids stay inside and play video games.  More and more kids are in daycare because of things like this.  I don't even think kids today know the definition of 'latchkey kid".  There are some place you live where there is a minimum age restriction to be left home.  This can be good and bad.  I remember having a key to the house and coming home to let myself in when I was in elementary school.  That won't happen until my eldest is at least 13.  It truly makes me sad that these are the days we live in.

Monday, January 23, 2012

some things I hate

I am allowed to say I hate this.  I am pretty sure God hates it to.  It is one of those things we have to deal with living in this world.  I hate cancer.  I hate what it does.  I hate how rampant it has become.  I never had to deal with this like my kids have when I grew up.  I heard about cancer.  My grandfather whom I never met died from stomach cancer.  Then people I knew sporadically got it.  I can count on one hand of the people I had known that died from it by the time I was 20.  I can name them.  My mom's friend Renee Simpkins died from leukemia when I was a teenager.  My grandmother died from Pancreatic cancer.  That was it.  Now I am having to tell my kids every year of somebody they know who gets it or dies from it.  I get the feeling when I tell them somebody dies they are going to assume it is cancer.  That infuriates me.  A lot can be prevented.  I believe our eating habits have contributed to a lot of the cancers.  If I see you post on Facebook you are tanning without sunblock I will get angry.  Melanoma is not something anybody should get.  I already have too many family members who have had precancerous or cancerous moles removed because of sun exposure.  They protected themselves, for the most part.  FYI-getting a nice glow is possible with 50 SPF.   FYI-that nice glow is actually your skin saying you have damaged me.  those lovely moles and freckles are also indicators of what has been done.  I am sure the person our family lost today would have fixed it has he known he could.  too many of us blow off our moles thinking they are no big deal.  Let a doctor tell you they are no big deal-please.  This evening we lost somebody special due to melanoma.

Kurt Mostert-  practically family.  spent every Christmas and  holidays and just hanging out with the Kennedy's for years.  HE is known as Uncle Kurt.  He would do anything for you.  HE would fix things and make things because it brought him joy to do so.  I can't tell you the number of times he fixed our lawn mower.  He also loved to joke and  tease.   It made me crazy but will miss it.  I will miss seeing my sister n law Natalie's windshield wipers sticking straight up because it is what they did to each other's cars.  I will miss the bantering about how Ford's are better than Chevrolet's and how the Gator's are the best college team on the planet.  I will miss how he loved pecan pie and had no understanding how anybody could like pumpkin.  I will miss seeing him torture Samson, the dog by getting him all riled up to play with him.  I will miss seeing his big Ford truck driving down the road.  He could be depended on for anything needed.  He loved helping people and he ultimately loved Jesus.  So thankful we have the hope that he will only be missed for a little while.  Because he no longer has pain.  He no longer has to deal with cancer.  No longer has to deal with medicines that make him sick.  We are sad because we miss him.  We have joy knowing that he is up there with Jesus and his mom just worshiping.  There is hope that all that put faith in Jesus will get that.  That is the thing we cling to and look forward to.   That is what makes dealing with this loss bearable.
Uncle Kurt holding Charlotte Dec 2010

Thursday, January 12, 2012

introspection of a biblical wife

this is today's focus.  Had to evaluate myself by answering some questions.  Most I could answer and say I was doing right.  some need work.  We can all work to improve ourselves.  There are things God wants us to change in our lives.  He reveals it to us when the time is right.  There are some things that I need to work on now that I was in no way ready to work on years ago.  God will continually reveal things to me until the day He calls me home.  If I did not need things to work on then I would go to the pond down the street and walk on top of it.  Last time I checked only one person was perfect enough to walk on water.  Well technically two, but Peter only lasted until he doubted what God said.  So I work on what God wants me to today and when that is accomplished the next task will be revealed.  As long as I become more like Christ then I am OK with the changes I need to make

Friday, January 6, 2012

Crochet pattern review-Holly Leaf Pattern

I made this darling hat

for my baby and absolutely adore it that I had to write a review about it.  This hat is one of my most favorite ones I have made.  The pattern is also one of my favorites.  She explained everything in wonderful easy detail and also had pictures that made it easy to understand even for beginners.  The pattern can be found here :  The Lovely Crow   she has so many great ones that I will buy patterns from her again.  There are even matching booties for this hat I made.   Here are pictures of my Charlotte wearing the hat.

This is one of the things I do that brings me joy and patterns like this one just make it even more enjoyable.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012


So Day 2 of The Respect Dare asked to look back on your childhood to see where that could shape your idea of marriage today.  A lot of what I write about this study will be vague that deals with me personally..  Some details are private and need not be shared for the world to see.  However, thankfully, Doug and I have parents that are both still married getting close to fifty years.  I believe this helps, not in every situation.  There are divorces and  separations from our siblings but I believe it did help to lay a foundation of commitment.  I think we take what is good and incorporate it and then take out what we would want to do differently.  As long as each person is committed to changing the things that need to be changed then a marriage can stay together until death do us part.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

new day, new mercies, new challenges

First off it is cold out.  I just have to say it.  I am in GA and I am freezing my tooshie.  we may not have snow but 30 degrees is cold people.  I am supposed to run in this nonsense.  I will when it warms up to 4o something while the baby naps and kids do the schoolwork they don't need help with.  I will be making the hand -warmers this week.

Back on track with eating the way I feel God wants me too.  I am back to no dairy (as much as possible until grocery shopping.  this may be unavoidable in some instances with dinner.  I just did not buy the ingredients I normally would cook with to make it happen so dinner will be dairy free.  But my omelet has no cheese and my coffee has coconut milk so we are starting off good.  (My omelet has my homemade salsa in it so it makes me happy)

I want to bog daily and want to have meaning behind it.  I don't want to get to the point where I am being redundant and letting you know my daily routine.  unless you want to know when I go to the bathroom, i can email you.  So I plan to blog about my book I am reading.  It was given to me and where Doug and I are at in our marriage, I can easily do it.  the Respect Dare  I don't believe this book is for everybody.  I don't agree that it is for every wife in every situation of marriage.  But I don;t have to fully agree with an author of a book to read it or be challenged by it.  I had a realization when we went down to Fl about myself.  "Old Tory" likes to reappear.  I left her there when we moved here.   'Old Tory"  like to belittle and talk to her husband like he is a child.  she likes to criticize him in front of everybody.   Old Tory likes to take on personality traits that are not hers because others around her do this  (if you are reading this you are most likely not the one that I am talking about)  This in turn brings back old Doug and old habits die hard and it becomes an ugly vicious cycle that neither one of want to be like.  So I do the respect Dare.  It is for 40 days.  It goes along with the Love Dare.  I may do that one day but loving my husband is easy.  Respecting him at times can be difficult because I like to think my ways are always the right ways.  well they are not and if they were I should have just married myself.  Please don't think that this means I become a doormat and become a geisha girl or get treated like the wife of a neanderthal.  Those are lies straight from the devil and we as wives have come to believe them. (Generally speaking)   A lot of wives today think respecting everybody but their husband is OK.    I want my husband to feel like he is respected by his wife.  To not feel like his wife is his parent or makes him feel like he is not capable of making decisions or that he less than a man. To no joke sarcastically or make fun of him in front of others.   I see this a lot.  It destroys their spirit.  ( they may not show that it bothers them or say anything but eventually it will come out)  I don't want to do that.  My husband and I can joke around with each other but we know, for the most part, what to joke about.   so Day 1 was to write expectations about myself and my husband that would indicate our marriage is progressing.  Not sharing at this time and may never.  Some things with this book are private and wont be aired for the world to see.  But those that know us will see the evidence.  we have a good marriage but I believe every marriage can be made better. I believe that is where the phrase "marriage takes work." comes in.  It is constantly working on daily being better than where you were the day before.

Monday, January 2, 2012

I don't believe in resolutions

First lets look at the definition.  NO wonder that the statistics show that  40% are given up by the end of January and 75% are given up by February 15th.    That definition depressed me   |I prefer to look at it like setting goals.  Everybody should have goals.  the goals should be met with the right motivation.  One of my goals is to lose weight.  The right motivation is because it will make me healthier and feel better about myself.  When I feel better about myself  I have a better attitude and this makes my household a happier place for the people that live here.  God wants me to be healthy.  He wants all of us to be happy.  This way it makes it achievable.  If I do it so I can look like a supermodel and be able to shop for skinny jeans and clothes that at my age one should never wear then I will fail.   I have many goals I will accomplish this year. 

1  Read my bible daily.  I will read through the bible in one year.  I will be following a reading plan.  this will bring me closer to God which is my number one desire.

2.  Forgive like God forgives.  I still have a tendency to hold on to wrongs done to me and want to ponder on them  and stay mad/  I do not want to be like this.  I once heard the definition of forgiveness does not mean you forget.  what it means is you let it go and you never talk about it again.  Once you can do that you know you have truly forgiven.

3.  Read at least one book a month.  For me this is realistic.  I would love to read more than that but with the many goals I have it is not possible.  One book I will do will  be The Respect Dare .  It will make me a better wife.  I only recommend this book if your marriage is in a good season and you are looking to make it better. I think we can always try to be a better spouse no matter how good your marriage is. It is not a book for marriages that are abusive, emotionally or physically.   so  I don't recommend it if you are in that situation.  I don't agree with her on all her insights on her blog but the book has good principles.

4.  Run 3 miles in less than 30 min.  Over the next two weeks I will be running every other day.  this week will be for 24 min.  Next week will be 30 min.  After that I will be following a training plan to build my speed.

5.  Concentrate on how and what goes into my mouth.  There will be 30 day challenges in this area again.  the how is actually eating. there are days I skip breakfast and don't drink enough water.  there are days I don't eat enough fruits and veggies.  I want to remedy this.

6.  Finish school by July 1.  This is not optional.  I have a scholarship and if it is not done I will have to pay back the 4000.00 that I received to get my degree.

7.  write lists daily of what needs to get done and follow a time schedule.  I do better with this.  If I don't I lose time and wonder why I cant get things done.  Type A personality will be very evident with this and will make the husband and the three younger children bang their heads into walls.

8.  wake up early and go to bed early.  I like to stay up late.  It is because it is the only time I get to just be "me".  However, it is not working.  I am tired and need more sleep.  I will have to schedule time to be "me" in the week.  I want to wake up at 6:00, so I can be "me" before anybody else in the house is up.  It may even be 5:30 because I want to run in the morning.   I need to be in bed by 10:00 to ensure I get plenty of sleep to be the person I want to be in the beginning of this post.

9.  Finish teaching myself to knit and knit me something.  I am undecided yet as to what but I want to say this is something accomplished.

10.  Crochet the girls the hats they have been begging me for and crochet Charlotte's Christmas stocking.  the girls may all get new Christmas stockings.  I think if they get one designed the way they want they will cherish it all the more. 

11.  develop closer relationships with women who are Christ followers.  This means I need to step out and actually do something about it.  I am actually an introvert.  Yes, hard to believe because once you know me I seem to extroverted, but I prefer to be by myself in my four walls.  I hate meeting new people.  I hate trying to start conversations.  If I do a get together with a new person I usually have to have somebody else I know really well over.  This means I need to stop being a hermit.  

12.  Become more Christ like.  This will mean changing things about me that I don't really want to.  I want to be kinder.  I want my husband to feel respected and not like I am his mom.  I hate the way I speak to him some days.  I want my kids to not have a mom that yells because my type a personality has unrealistic expectations of how my children should be.  There are more effective ways to discipline than how I have been doing it.  

Pretty good goals that will make me more Christ like than I was last year which is my goal every year.  I want to be better every year until God calls me home.